We all have them, but most of us have no idea how they influence our life... I'm talking about values ya'll! Values are the different principles that we live by. They're the things that drive us to do something (or sometimes to not) and they are what you believe are important in the way you live and work.
Values help to determine your priorities, and, deep down, they are probably what you use to measure, to tell if your life is turning out the way you want it to. When the things you do in life match up with the values that you hold life is normally going well for you.
However when things are misaligned and your personal values are not being met, thats when things tend to feel uncomfortable and can lead us to being unhappy. This is when you are acting out of a fear based value and can cause either in-action or avoidance.
It can be detrimental to our well-being when acting from fear, because it leads to self-doubt and feeling of unworthiness. These are the things that can be defined as the "have to's" instead of the "want to's" which are conscious based values. The good news is though that you can stop acting out of fear once you realize what your core values are and re-align your life to them.
How do you do this? Well, there is no quick fix, because you really want to take time to get to the nitty gritty of what makes you tick, but there are questions you can ask and reflect on to help you figure out what your values are. Here are 3 questions to help you determine your values:
- Think about the times when you were happiest in your life. What value was being expressed and what other factors contributed to your happiness?
- Think about a time when your life unbalanced or up in-the-air. What was compromised? What made you feel not so good about what you were doing?
- What must you experience in your life to make sure it's happy and has a great outlook?
Once you are able to figure out what has made you happy in the past, what made you act out of fear, and what you need, you will be able to now determine your honest and truest values that you hold dear. They can be anything, and not even limited to this list, but here are some examples:
Don't limit yourself either, you can have as many values as you see fit, prioritizing them though is the key. Try to determine your top 5 values, list them out and keep them on a post it note close to you. Whenever you are feeling like something isn't aligning right in your life, look at it and see if one of those 5 are being compromised. Doing this will make sure that your life is one of positivity and happiness and forward moving action!
For me, my top 5 values are Family, Friendship, Integrity, Community and Joy. So for me, an example of when my values are not being met could be if I am working 70+ hours a week, even if the income is satisfying, the values of time for family, friends and community would be out of alignment and I would be thinking of why I am not satisfied.
Want to know more about values? My FREE class on values from my latest eCourse "Taking Charge" is now available! Click the link and sign up to get instant access and also VIP emails about discounts and information leading up to the Taking Charge course launch in July! You can also download the values checklist here!
I really want to get to know you and what makes you tick! In the comments below, leave what are your values! Want to know more about coaching? Check out this page or email me hi@honestlyable if you want to talk more!
If your ready to dive in, why not set up a complimentary 20 minute discovery call with me and see if we are a good fit for each other!
*value list from mindtools.com