It was a cold and rainy day in Clarksville, TN. My husband and I were working our tails off to get our old house packed, cleaned and ready for the new buyers to move into, the very next morning. O did I mention this was NYE and we had been packing all through the holidays? To say my stress level was through the roof would be an understatement.
Would we survive living with our friends for a month?
Would the new buyers love this house like we loved it?
Would the new buyers actually go through with the purchase?
Are we making the right choice?
O, and can my business thrive when I am in a constant state of chaos?
All of these questions and more where circling in my head, all while I was trying to craft an Instagram post to reflect my mood, and provide value to my audience. This is when the tears came, slowly at first but eventually into those really good cathartic cries that you don't realize are good to have in the moment.
"I am suppose to be a confidence coach who is failing at being confident right now, while trying to tell my audience to have faith in times of stress/worry/chaos." is literally where my thoughts were. I wasn't necessary at that point where the negative self-talk was telling me I wasn't good enough, but it was close. I realized in this moment that even though I felt like I should post because it was 8am and everyone posts at 8am, am I right? That is was ok to not post for the day... Gasp, yes I said it, I gave myself permission to not post on social that day.
Cut to today, because that incident happened at the end of 2016/beginning of 2017 and I have had many more moments like that, most recently with the passing of my grandma, I haven't felt inspired to post on social media and ya know what, it felt good to take a step back for a few weeks!
At first I was kicking myself because you know, I want to gain new clients and all, but there was a lesson learned here. Sometimes there are more important things going on, in our life or business that we need to allow ourselves grace and disconnection to enjoy, rather than put it out into the world in hopes for more likes, followers, or even sales, yup I said it.
I ended up really not posting a ton in the first month of the year and for the last few weeks of April, with a few FB page posts, a few FB group posts and maybe a handful if insta-posts and you know what... my business didn't crumble, my followers were still there and I felt really good about being present in my life over pressured by social media. Now I do not mean pressured as in bullied, but the pressure we put on ourselves to constantly post and share and over share. There are schedulers I know that help with this but there are also times in our business when it warrants a break and mine needed to happen.
So how can you feel good about going social media free for a bit or to tell when your ready/at your breaking point?
1) When posting to your platform or scheduler feels forced or makes you not feel good about yourself. This is called posting to post and I guarantee that those posts do not do as well, as the ones where people can "feel" the excitement. It is all about your energy and buy-in around it and if you do not have either, I am giving you permission to not post.
2) On the weekends, always. This is probably something we all say we will do, but how many times have you picked up the phone or computer because you were bored or felt like if you did not you were missing out on something... When we do this, we are missing out on the life around us and are sending the message to potential clients that we are always available, which we are most definitely not. Social media free weekends helps me set up boundaries and allows myself to recharge my mind and eyes to get ready for the week ahead! So this weekend when the urge strikes to post, snap, tweet or share, why not pick up a book, ask your significant other to go do something or just sit in the silence!
3) When the things in your life don't align with what your brand is about or don't provide value. I am going to get real here, well I have been real the whole time, but this is an opinion that may not be well received... I do not believe our entire lives need to be on social media. While it is great for our businesses and can really help connect us to our audience, because a business is a human with an idea, there are still things that can hurt your business by sharing too much. My move for example, while I shared a bit, was not something I overshared or felt the need to put out there because I am a business owner. Unless it provided value or felt like there was a win to share it stayed private. I am a firm believer that our private and public spheres of life are at a cross roads because of social media and the lines can be blurry sometimes, but in order to have a sense of privacy you need to respect yourself enough to not post it all! I say this from a place of love and compassion because we want to be liked and seen as the leaders in our field, but the greatest leaders of all know when to share and when to just be in the moment of life and not care if others "saw" it. <3 I promise you, the people who want to work with you, will still be there when you come back online, as long as you set the foundation up for it!
These are just my thoughts and opinions on the matter and I am totally open to hearing your thoughts on this too, these tips are just how I personally came to the conclusion of how I am choosing to post and share and are not intended to "bully" you into doing the same, they are just food for thought for whenever you are at a moment like I had earlier in the year!
If you want to talk with me about this or figure out how to be comfortable with going social media free, lets chat! Click here and we can set up a coffee chat and see where the conversation leads us!
If you want accountability on this, why not set up a clarity call to get clear on how you want to implement this for yourself!